Hooking up with girls at clubs and bars

One of the easiest things to do if you are cool is to go to a bar or a club and hook up with a beautiful girl. Girls’ like to hook up with cool guys; in fact I’d wager that it’s practically impossible not to do this, if you happen to be a cool guy such as myself. But you see, this is why I truly am the coolest guy there is. Toledo does not have to hook up with beautiful women to prove this well known fact, in fact Toledo deliberately doesn't do such things so as to show up other so-called 'cool' guys for the phoney’s that they are.

You see night after night Toledo has been going to bars and clubs and not hooking up with women, which as I said is very hard to do. Toledo practically has to remove the women from him once he is inside, but I simply say “I’m sorry ladies, I know I am very cool and alluring and that you cannot help but throw yourselves at me, but you see I am so cool that I cannot hook up with you, much as I would like to. This is the curse of being so supremely cool.” After this I will go sit in the corner of the bar and sip away at my pint staring longingly across the room. Such a display only gathers me more female attention as women love nothing more than a noble broody man who denies himself pleasure for the greater good.

The only downside to my supreme coolness is that after months and months of not hooking up with women in bars and clubs people have started to doubt that Toledo can do such a thing. To those who say that I usually just laugh, or, depending on how much lonely beer I have had, smash the nearest bottle and lunge for their throat screaming with rage.

- Toledo